A winning proposition

I'm taking an ASL religion class just for fun. There is one guy in there in his mid-thirties who lately has been flirting with me. Not the casual, you're-kinda-cute kind of flirting, but the full-force- high-school- boy-obvious kind of flirting. I'd explain, but you probably remember being a freshman.

Anyway, after class on Thursday, I edged toward my car for half an hour while he ranted about preparing for the coming anarchy. Given my aversion to firearms, he did allow that I could get a samuri sword if I learned how to use it. While I pondered my options for self defense, the following TOP TEN list gradually became apparent.

Top 10 reasons the guy in my Institute class is not for me:

10. He's read three books in the last 5 years.  One of them was a pamphlet on aliens.

9. YouTube is his primary source of information.  He considers things reportedly overheard in a government office by anonymous tipsters to have special credibility.

8. He referred to President Obama, whom I respect,  as a “Black Hitler.”

7. He's currently unemployed.

6. He loves guns and carries a loaded one on his person at home, even with his kids.

5. Home is living with his mom.

4. He's knows Armegeddon is coming soon.  He can't wait because it will be a great fight.

3. He claims to have seen Satan in his backyard.

2. He's married.

And the number one reason this guy is not for me:
1.  I failed to appreciate this gallant offer:
“I'll give you my mom's address so when the anarchy starts, you can come over and I'll protect you, too! We have plenty of guns, my mom has a big ol' garden, and my wife wouldn't even care!”  Anarchy, armament, unemployment, and polygamy all rolled into one- how could I resist?